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01 August 2007

To the most inconsiderate asshole of a friend
I'm writing this because I know that if I say what I have to say to your face I will probably punch you.
I don’t know you anymore. I don’t see you any more. All I get is a quick text or a rushed email from you every few days. I know you are busy and I know you have Bethany, but hello? I’m supposed to be your best friend.
You have no idea what this summer has been like. Since we were kids, we pushed away every single person that could possibly have been out friend until there was only me and you. It’s not that we didn’t want anyone else, it’s just that we didn’t need them. You always had me. I always had you. Now you have Bethany and I have no one.
Sadly, it looks like you don’t need me any more. I feel like those other people that used to try to become our friends. I know you’re probably not doing it deliberately just as we never did. Anyway, I’m not moaning on how much I hate her, I’m just trying to tell you that I miss you. And that, well… I’m lonely.
Whenever you cancel nights out, I end up staying home with mum and dad watching TV. Stephanie’s always out and even Kevin has more of a life than I do. It’s so depressing. This was supposed to be our summer of fun. What happened? Can’t you be friends with two people at once?
I know you have found someone who is extra special, and that you both have a unique ‘bond’, or whatever, that you and I will never have. But we have another bond: we’re best friends. Or does the best friend bond disappear as soon as you meet someone else? Maybe it does, and I just don’t understand that because I haven’t met that ‘somebody special’. I’m not in any hurry to either. I liked things the way they were.
In a few years’ time, if my name ever comes up you will probably say, ‘Rosie. Now there’s a name I haven’t heard in ages. We used to be best friends. I wonder what she’s doing now; I haven’t seen or thought of her in years!’ you will sound like my mum and dad when they have dinner parties with friends and talk about old times. They mention people I’ve never heard of when they’re talking about some of the most important days of their lives. How could mum’s bridesmaid of twenty years ago be someone she doesn’t even ring up now? Or in dad’s case, how could he not know where his own best friend from school lives?
Anyway, my point is (I know, I know, there is one), I don’t want to be one of those easily forgotten people, so important at the time, so special, so influential and so treasured, yet years later just a vague face and a distant memory. I want us to be best friends for ever, Alex.
I’m happy you’re happy, really I am, but I feel like I’ve been left behind. Maybe our time has come and gone. Maybe your time is now meant to be spent with Bethany. And if that’s the case I won’t bother sending you this letter then what am I doing. Still writing? Ok, I’m going now and I’m ripping these muddled thoughts up.

Your friend,
Rosie

ripped this out of a book.




10:14 AM


wendy
twenteen
sajc uoL



when the tough gets going
just keep walking