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16 June 2006

and sometimes i really wonder what am i blogging for?

anyhow, this week's been a little up and down.
i've been driftin away a lot from my books.
and seriously, i wish i could throw all these thoughts away from my mind.

first to begin with was vertigo.
it started the chain rxn.
or maybe even ahead of it.
it bugs me very much.
i don't understand why it turned out to be so mind boggling.
and i began wondering..

but somethings never changes,
i'm pretty upset over the fact that someone whom i always thought knew me well called me

CHEAP.

somehow, that's not the point.
i mean i always thought that we were really close and you knew i wasn't that kind of person.
plus this person probably knew how much he meant to me, even as a friend.
i didn't mind any one calling me a bitch.
but somehow, when it came out from you,
it was just so..
alright, i can't describe.

and when i was on my way home today,
it chanced upon me that i was really really soft hearted.
why did i even bother to forgive someone so much?
when the actions of others wasn't justifiable?
why?

but i made a promise to myself to never go again.
by that, i promise that a next mistake would mean a snap.
but i realise i made this promise tonnes and tonnes of times.
this time i'm really tired and i just can't imagine having you breach that trust again. but there isn't much trust to begin with. owell. i really feel distant from you. i don't the friends you hang out with anymore. and there really is a lot of girls around you now. what's more you only sweet talk to these girls but NEVER ME.

NEVER ME.
I'M just nothing more than a CHEAP BITCH.
YOU grabbed me by the head.

9:13 PM


wendy
twenteen
sajc uoL



when the tough gets going
just keep walking